flip_the_lights: (gendarmeExcursionist)
Olivia Dunham ([personal profile] flip_the_lights) wrote2012-05-15 10:58 pm

[Pesterlog]

"It's a cross-world communication platform called T-Minus. One of the patrons coded it a little while ago; it runs on this handheld, which -- "

"Walter, careful!"

"This is marvelous! Do you realize the implications in being able to communicate through the multiversal barrier? It would eliminate so many of the -- and what's this on the back here?"

"It's...how you feed it."

"Partly organic as well! This is a marvel, Agent Dunham. Let me see, so you, you type it like your little blackberries, I assume, like so..."

"Walter. Can I have it back? I'll show you."

"Oh. Of course, my dear."


*** gendarmeExcursionist [GE] has signed on to T-Minus

arsenicCatnip [AC] has begun trolling gendarmeExcursionist [GE]
AC: :33 < *ac p33rs out of her cave, whiskers twitching*
AC: :33 < olivia is that you?

GE: Yes, it's me.
GE: Hello, Nepeta. How are you? I haven't seen you since the collapse.


"'Whiskers twitching?' Seriously?"

"Peter, she's just a kid."

AC: :33 < im good
AC: :33 < the collapse wasnt so bad in the end
AC: :33 < efurything came back as good as new
AC: :33 < karkat got lost but i found him again and hes okay
AC: :33 < and more of my furiends have been coming!
AC: :33 < how are you?

GE: I'm doing well.
GE: I made it through the collapse okay, too - I was able to get some help from other people in the bar.
GE: I'm glad you're all right and your friends are there with you. :)

AC: :33 < im glad youre okay too!
AC: :33 < *ac rubs against your ankles and purrs*


"Um."

GE: *Olivia...pats you on the head*
GE: Speaking of friends, I have some here with me who've never been to Milliways. They'd like to say hi.
GE: Would that be all right?

AC: :33 < sure!
AC: :33 < hello furiends of olivia

GE: HELLO
GE: ITS VERY NICE TO MEET YOU
GE: OH THIS IS BRILLIANT


"Walter, you're using capslock. You can turn it off if you -- "

GE: AGENT DUNHAM SAID YOUR NAME WAS NEPETA?

"...oooor you can keep it on. That works, too."

AC: :33 < yes thats my name
AC: :33 < whats yours?

GE: I AM DR WALTER BISHOP
GE: OLIVIA AND I WORK TOGETHER
GE: IVE DONE A GREAT DEAL OF RESEARCH INTO PARALLEL WORLDS SO YOU CAN IMAGINE I WAS QUITE TICKLED WHEN SHE TOLD ME ABOUT MILLIWAYS

AC: :33 < oh
AC: :33 < well i dont know much about purrallel worlds
AC: :33 < but milliways is wonderful!

GE: I HAVE HEARD NOTHING BUT GOOD THINGS
GE: EXCEPT FOR THIS DREADFUL COLLAPSE BUSINESS
GE: BUT THAT SEEMS TO HAVE RESOLVED ITSELF SATISFACTORILY
GE: AND OLIVIA HAS BEEN KIND ENOUGH TO GATHER DATA FOR ME
GE: SHE SEEMS TO HAVE A KNACK FOR REACHING MILLIWAYS WHEREAS I CANNOT
GE: THOUGH IT HAPPENS TOO UNPREDICTABLY TO BRING ME ALONG IM AFRAID
GE: :(
GE: MY SON TAUGHT ME HOW TO MAKE THAT SAD FACE

AC: :33 < thats too bad :((
AC: :33 < but maybe someday youll be able to come visit!
AC: :33 < whats a son?


"Um."

"Oh dear."

"...Her culture's a little different from ours. Here, can I -- ?"

GE: Hi, it's Olivia again.
GE: Remember when I explained what a mother and father were? If their child's a boy, it's called their son.
GE: Walter's son works with us, too.

AC: :33 < oh ok
AC: :33 < you have adults and children working in the same place?

GE: No, we don't. Peter's about my age; Walter's much older than both of us.
GE: Here, I'll let you talk to Peter for a minute.


"...yeah, okay. Talk to the kid from a whole different universe who likes to pretend she's a cat. Just another day at the office."

GE: hi nepeta.
GE: this is peter bishop.


"Note how I'm not using allcaps, Walter?"

"Well, if I chose not to use them now, she wouldn't be able to differentiate between us!"

AC: :33 < hi peter!
AC: :33 < so do you all research parallel unifurses?

GE: yeah, but that's just one part of it.
GE: anything that gets classified as "weird" falls under our purview. if it's unexplained, we've got to try and explain it.
GE: which usually involves walter rambling at us for a while and me and olivia doing all the legwork.

AC: :33 < h33 h33 h33
AC: :33 < that sounds like the best job efur
AC: :33 < you get to play with weird stuff!

GE: and gross stuff.
GE: i got to chase down a cold virus the size of my foot once. that thing was fast.

AC: :33 < ... olivia
AC: :33 < is he pulling my tail ://

GE: I wish he was. I had to chase it, too.
GE: We trapped it under a trash can so we could take it back to the lab for examination.

AC: :33 < but ...
AC: :33 < *ac rumples up her nose in purrplexment*
AC: :33 < how does a virus even get that big??

GE: BY AN INGENIOUS PROCESS THAT INVOLVES ALTERING THE VIRUS THEN INCUBATING IT IN A HUMAN HOST VIA A SMALL AMOUNT OF POWDER
GE: THIS POWDER BEARS A SIMILARITY TO EGGS WHICH WHEN EXPOSED TO STOMACH ACID HATCH AND GROW TO EXTRAORDINARY PROPORTIONS


"That case sounds even dumber when he writes it out like that."

"And yet..."

"And yet."


GE: SO ONE COULD FOR INSTANCE DEPOSIT THAT POWDER IN A GLASS OF WATER OR IN A PERSONS FOOD
GE: WHICH WOULD ALLOW FOR INGESTION AND THE OPPORTUNITY FOR RAPID GROWTH

AC: :33 < ohhh
AC: :33 < sort of like murderberry s33ds then!

GE: MURDERBERRY SEEDS
GE: IM AFRAID I HAVE NOT HEARD OF THOSE BEFORE
GE: COULD YOU DESCRIBE THEM

AC: :33 < you dont have murderberries?
AC: :33 < they grow on a vine
AC: :33 < very sw33t and juicy
AC: :33 < but you have to be careful not to swallow the s33ds
AC: :33 < beclawse if you do they sprout and the sprouts purralyze you
AC: :33 < and then a new vine grows and uses your body for furtilizer

GE: okay. my turn.
GE: are you pulling our legs?

AC: :33 < no!
AC: :33 < i dont have any pictures to show you
AC: :33 < but olivia could get murderberry juice from the bar to bring back
AC: :33 < except you can only get it with the s33ds already filtered out

GE: IS THERE ANY WAY TO OBTAIN THE SEEDS AS WELL

"Walter, no."

AC: :33 < purrobably?
AC: :33 < only i dont know if they would grow on your world


GE: I SUPPOSE IT COULD BE WORTH A

"Walter! You are not growing murderous plants in our lab. Give me that -- "

GE: thanks for the offer, but i think we'll stick with the juice.
GE: uh, what does it taste like? besides sweet?

AC: :33 < its nice!
AC: :33 < sw33ter than the fresh berries
AC: :33 < ... i dont know how else to describe it ://

GE: It's okay, Nepeta.
GE: It does sound good. I'll pick some up for everybody to share the next time I'm in Milliways. Thank you for telling us about it. :)

AC: :33 < youre welcome! :DD
AC: :33 < *ac purrs happily*


"Are you sure you can't obtain just one or two little -- "

In unison: "No."

GE: And I think it's time for us to get back to work.
GE: It was nice talking to you, Nepeta.

AC: :33 < you too!
AC: :33 < bye olivia and furiends

GE: GOODBYE NEPETA
GE: bye nepeta



gendarmeExcursionist [GE] has ceased trolling arsenicCatnip [AC]
*** gendarmeExcursionist [GE] has logged off